The Right Way To Look at The World

I've been watching the first season of The White Lotus and for those unfamiliar with the show, it follows a few rich families as they spend their time at a resort in Hawaii. Each family is massively flawed though one particularly caught my attention due to their conversations. The mother is a CEO of a multinational cooperation, the father is unknown but makes less than her, son is addicted to pornography and screens, and daughter is a drug addict with insane jealousy issues. They all have different ideas of what is right and voice them often. The daughter has a black friend who she brought, who both share the idea that "it's time for the white man to step aside" which is contrary to the mother who feels for her son, saying that it's not his fault and not he's being unfairly ostracized from society. The resort they are staying at used to be native and sacred land but the government and developers didn't care. Some of those natives now work at the hotel. Tha...
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friends

 I want friends and the only people I can seem to connect with on an emotional level are women. The problem then becomes that I want to sleep with them. My thought is that that is the way I'm programmed as a man and I shouldn't seek women friendships. Instead I should connect with men which unfortunately I've struggled with tremendously. I'm saying this having had close friends since high school yet I'm not able to bond with them the way I wish I could. It's difficult to explain the difference between male friendships and female friendships but the ladder typically energizes me and gives me confidence while the ladder feels like a chore. A lot of the guys I meet seem really stupid and only want to talk about sports. 

I feel stuck wanting new friendships and relationships and constantly feeling like I either fuck it up or don't actually like the person. Typically it's the people I find most interesting that I struggle to interact with. I see all their good qualities and assume they'd want nothing to do with me.

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